Book of Me: Prompt 19 – Who Do I Miss

This week’s prompt (Prompt 19) is – Who Do You Miss?

Having just gone through the Festive season our thoughts turn to those not with us. 

Whether that is people who live elsewhere and that we will not see over the festive season

People that have passed away.
Who do you miss?
Why do you miss them?
Them as an individual
Something specific to them

I went back and forth on publishing this one but figured it wouldn’t come as a big surprise when I say who. There are many people I deeply miss and I wish I could spend time with them just once more, especially now that I’m older. I can’t decide between two so I’m going with both of them.

My grandmother: Mary Jane (Hummel) Witherell

Grandma Witherell wedding day

She’s the journal I’ve been transcribing and the one who started me on this path. She would tell me some amazing stories (which I can’t remember fully, of course) when I was younger about the family and she also instilled in me a sense of pride of knowing who came before.

To say why I miss her terribly is very personal. Suffice it to say that there was a lot left unsaid. Things I wish I would have told her, asked her, and talked to her about. I always tried to make her proud of me and I’d like to know if she is/was.

And as I continue with her journal, I realize I didn’t know her well at all and I feel rather awful about that. I just wish I had had more time. There was still so much to say and do. Her death wasn’t unexpected by most, but it was by me. I was 17 at the time but I assumed that she would beat cancer. I couldn’t imagine life without her so I just denied the possibility.

It’s hard to think of her without tearing up right away. I fell apart at her funeral (so much so that my grandpa changed his wishes for his funeral so as to avoid that) and it took me YEARS (about 10) to finally visit her grave.

I’m already going through tissues so I’ll go on to the next person.

My great-aunt: Theresa “Betty” (Langeneck) VanGuilder

Aunt Betty and Uncle Van

Aunt Betty and Uncle Van

Her real name is Theresa but we called her Betty. The story is that her dad wanted her name to be Theresa and her mom wanted Betty. So they compromised. She was like another grandmother to me, and I miss her counsel, her warmth, her smile, and her cooking.

My sister and I spent a lot of time playing at her house and watching movies. She was our favorite baby-sitter and we LOVED going to her house for New Years Eve (until we were teens of course) and Christmas Eve.

She also died when I was 17, just about 6 months after my grandma. I don’t have a lot of things left unsaid with her, or at all really. I just miss her. I can remember her without tears but with smiles and laughter instead (which usually turn to misty-eyes after a while).I wish to just talk to her again, ask her about her family and childhood and just… well just talk to her. I miss her.

I’d also love her help on knitting/crocheting. She taught my sister and me once before and I remember she was very patient with us. I need another patient teacher to help me out! :)

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